butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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