Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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