i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
