Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
