You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I have aggressive nipples.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
