And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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