i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
