dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
