theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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