But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
