but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
