ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize
