Apparently you make a good broom.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
