I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
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