He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
