BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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