If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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