Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
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