Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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