Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
