can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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