so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize