who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
