Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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