$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
