I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Randomize
