with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
