Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
