So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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