Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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