It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
