Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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