i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
