her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
