Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I AM VODKA MAN
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I DEMAND FORESKIN
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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