is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
