Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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