you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
