Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
this will be a night to untag.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
