I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize