I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Blood and glitter go together right?
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
