Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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