hotel room ftw
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
