forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
