he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
oh god the rape fog is back!
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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