Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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