I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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