So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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