dude i'm inner monologue high
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
