do herpes really smell.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
